Finding Success From Disappointments and Painful Experiences

Painful experiences can teach us life lessons. They can help strengthen our core, rebuild or redefine our character, and sharpen our focus. We all experience pain from disappointments at some point in our lives, but pain does not have to destroy us. We can use our painful experiences as stepping-stones to success.

The pain of failing at something is one of the more challenging kinds of pain. When you do not succeed, take the time to evaluate what happened. Allow yourself to analyze what happened that caused you to fall short of your goals. Ask yourself "why?" and make a list of the things that you think contributed to your not being successful in accomplishing your goal.

Think of Chris Bosh of the Miami Heat. He was injured and unable to play in some of the Eastern Conference Playoffs during 2012. However, in the big deciding seventh game against the Boston Celtics, Chris Bosh made three out of four three-point shots. Not known to be a three-point shooter, Bosh explained that while sitting and watching his team play, he visualized playing in the game.

We also have to visualize our goals when we are sidelined by disappointment or pain. This pain can be physical, emotional or spiritual. To succeed, we have to visualize ourselves accomplishing our desired goal. Chris Bosh wanted to play in the championship series, so he visualized himself playing in that series. Although he had missed several games, when he was called to play, he was simply on fire.

Do you allow your pain from disappointments to sideline you from reaching your goals? Do you wallow in self-pity? When you have a disappointment, do you have difficulty rebounding? If you are doing any of these things, you are allowing your pain to destroy you, and keep you from accomplishing your goals.

To succeed, you have to let go of the pain that's keeping you from moving forward. Try these simple steps the next time you are dealing with the pain from a disappointment:

1. Focus on your most important goal. Write it down so that the goal is clear. When you write it down, it allows you to clarify what you want. 
2. Commit to doing one task at a time toward reaching your goal. A written record of your goals will help to reinforce your commitment. 
3. Think about your motivations. When you remind yourself why you set the goal initially, it will help keep you on track and to re-energize your efforts in the pursuit of your goals.

Remember, you must let go of the pain that is holding you back. Everyone has disappointments, but successful people learn how to move forward despite painful experiences.

My prescription for succeeding after a painful experience is to not let the Pain hold you back; instead grow from it.

Looking for a nationally recognized speaker? Seen on ABC, NBC, Fox and CBS, Dr. Bragg is a nationally recognized speaker on the topics of success and leadership mastery. Her keynotes, breakouts and programs are particularly geared for university students, corporate leaders and women's groups. To contact Dr. Bragg about motivating and empowering your organization, visit her website at DrBraggSpeaks.com.